Tag Archives: Family

You are poor in your thoughts and not by money

Stacking things one over the other. When you are poor or not well off, you often live in houses that are small and made of 1-2 rooms. In such cases you end up using each room for multiple purposes like your living room, bed room and guest rooms are the same place even your study room. So based on the time and arrival of new members the structure of the room is changed to accommodate people or make space for some task.

You may have a small house but you can have big heart. Such rooms are often the size of around 150sqft. They are not even wide enough. In such scenarios you will to be having a habit of organising or moving your things around almost everyday. Stacking your clothes, bed and books becomes a norm. When you have to study you take out all books spread out and study often without a study table. Then when you have to carry on with other work or its night to sleep then you stack all the books and keep it in a corner usually covering with a cloth to avoid dusting. You have 3-4 chairs that are made of plastic which can be stacked on over the other or made of iron or steel that can be folded into flat piece and kept side by side.

Typical Matress in India

Multidimensional house. With the habit of stacking when not in use and pulling out one by one when guests arrive or many people have to sit in chairs, you end up making it your lifestyle. Doing such things over and over again you kind of train yourself to become someone with a stacking habit. In some households when there are people in large numbers then the chairs, they are made of sit down on the mattress made of plastic.

With times things change or do they. Over few decades new generation comes in and wealth is accumulated. Cities transform, houses transform and life is transformed. Now houses are big and you have enough wealth. You have space in each room and there are multiple rooms for each purpose. Some houses have multiple floors, increasing the variety of rooms. But you still end up using the same kind of chairs and end up making people sit in matress. What is more shocking that when you have enough space in the house, yet you end up stacking the chairs.

Plastic Chair

I do it because I was doing it. Similarly you never essentially make any major change in stacking books, clothes or bed. You have some assigned place for keeping things and multiples cupboards or wardrobes to keep things but you never actually get a hold of organising things in their optimum and the purpose of having place for each thing and keeping things in its designated place. You lack the functioning model. Often you end up misplacing things and searching in your rooms.

Your behaviours tell a lot about your inherent thoughts and beliefs. The idea here is not about the chairs, books, matress or stacking. It is about the habits we develop over time and make them our part and parcel of life. Even though people say change is the only constant they don’t seem to complete accept and apply it. We don’t embrace the change completely. We become part of the change willingly or unwillingly but we don’t adapt to the conditions as per how it is and how it is meant to be. This is seen for many things in life and across many classes of life.

You are poor in your thoughts and not by money!

One may have been trained to manage things well. Given a proper environment a child learns and thrives to face things well. Due to the reluctance to embrace situations we often end up confused and tired in dealing with new things. Certain times they make us feel depressed and drained. By consciously choosing to make small changes everyday within us, things that we feel must change, we step towards a smoother healthier life. There can be changes we want to make about our food habits, fitness, career, work style, interiors of household and many other things we come across in our life, sometimes very small while other times very important.

Step up to become the best version of yourself. Always try to embrace things as they are and work towards uplifting yourself, your family and your surroundings. Small changes and efforts when done collectively can introduce a lot of transformation in its true sense. By organising things, decluttering our surroundings and keeping things in their designated place, we free up our mind and surroundings. We develop a sense of freeness and openness. A smooth flow of thoughts without any stack or hustle.

Make small change in you often to bring about a big change in your life.


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Tennis is more than just sports, it’s a religion

Tennis, lawn tennis is one of the top grossing global sports with Grand Slams, WTA tours, ATP tours, Challenger tours and friendly matches. Tennis is played between two players in singles match and four players in doubles match. It could be men’s single, women’s single, men’s doubles, women’s doubles or mixed doubles. But that’s just not all. There is more to it than meets the eye.

Tennis is a saga. There are million dollars prize money, world tours, tournaments in many countries, schedules, sponsors, umpires, ball boys, referees and fans across the world. But is tennis just about the game, sports, winning and losing, finals, tickets, tours, locations or money. I believe tennis is much more than just a game, it is a religion, like no other.

Tennis teaches you discipline. Sports often is not about the games, rounds or matches. It is about the number of hours you have put in practice and the various strategies and tactics that you have learnt. Tennis is an individual sports. It is about standing tall all through the game from the start till the end. At any moment if you slip, rest, loose focus or get carried away, then the tables can turn for you.

Tennis teaches you dedication. It is about getting up in the morning and training for hours. It is about perfecting your serve, your return, backhand, slice or your volley. It is about practicing to approaching the net or your movement across the court. You must strengthen your muscles, your legs, your biceps, your mind and your body. You cannot be lazy or late.

Image : Pexels

You must train, train and train only to become so good at it, that when you get into the court, you are most of the time feeling a natural flow. Otherwise you may win a match but you will not win a tournament. You may be a good player but you might not become a champion. As they say a champion is who has trained hard when it felt it cannot be done any more.

Tennis teaches you resilience.

Tennis teaches you simplicity.

Tennis teaches you about respect, honor and dignity.

Tennis is timeless. People from all walks of life and other sports come to witness sporting events greatest moments in the finals of Grand Slams. It is about witness history in the making. It is as if you are looking at the finest qualities of human when put through the toughest challenge. It takes the seniors to their era and make them relieve those moments. It ignites the spirit of other sportsmen. It inspires the next generation to become not just a great glorified champion but a true honorable sportsman who will live in the memories of people in the times to come. It is about becoming Immortal.

Tennis messes with your mind, it haunts you and it makes you want to scream out loud but at the same time it takes you through the silence of a river in plains, deep forests and dark nights to awaken your inner spirits about life, passion, fighting spirit, grit, compassion and humanity. It takes you to the heights of a mountain and then throws you down to the depths of oceans, teaching you to be strong and humble at the same time.

Tennis is life and life is tennis. All the noise, hate, love, pressure, challenges, race towards tournaments, matches, rivals, competitors, events and controversies create heaviness in your heart and mind. Your family comes to your rescue. Tennis families are one of the best families in the world. Your coach, your physician, your friends are your strength in good times and bad times.

Image credit : Pexels

Tennis is one man show, individual sport. You are alone in the court and it teaches about sustainability, independence and self-work. It makes you go through the tough rides in some of the greatest moments in tennis history and as you are making them, you have to hold your nerves and put on a show.

Tennis turns young boys into men. Tennis teaches you to drink through the pain of lose and rising up from failures. It teaches you to gulp through your lose in face and stand up on the podium to speak about it. It teaches you to treat both the lose and victory alike. It is like the verse from Rudyard Kipling’s poem “If”.

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;   

Rudyard Kipling

Tennis is about sportsmanship and more. Tennis teaches you to be good sports person, a good partner, a good parent, a good friend, a good child and overall a good human being. It teaches you to be good friends. Tennis is about becoming the better version of yourself. Tennis teaches you about life, whether you a player, commentator or spectator. It takes you on a journey of life. It turns young boys into young men, who inspire generations of human current and past likewise. Tennis is about sportsmanship.

If good life is about living to be a good human and spreading love, care, positivity around the world. Then Tennis is one such part of life that teaches you to live it completely.


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Musings : You can choose to be like them or not to be like them

You are surrounded by people of various types in their emotional, mental and ethical mindsets. You are exposed to such varied ideologies, experiences and encounters everyday in your life. You can either become like them or choose to be different.

Early on some of the strongest influencers in your life are your parents and family. You almost become like a replica of them in your behaviour and mannerism. You have your personal identity as you become a combination of various influences and some influence more than the others.

Negativity has some kind of charm that it induces smoothly than anything else.

But as you grow in your life and become adept with language, reading, interactions, communication and commute, you develop certain sense of reasoning and thinking. During this time you are faced with a contradiction of thoughts based on what you face in your everyday life. You go into a state of dilemma with very little things and sometimes very important stuff. Let’s see some encounters that happen frequently and various responses to them based on someones attitude towards it.

Use of foul language. Many families avoid use of foul language in normal circumstances but in grim situations they loose their control and calm. They end up using bad language with abusive words and bad phrases. Often cursing each other in act and notion. Also if such situations are avoided or absent completely, the next challenge that comes up is when a kid is exposed to neighborhood and schools. By coming in face with the people in the surroundings and the kids in the vicinity often some kids mimic them and get influenced strongly. It is often seen that a kid comes home by learning some new word often very foul and demeaning. Negativity has some kind of charm that it induces smoothly than anything else.

You can either be like them or be like yourself.

A choice to make. As the kid is put into certain condition and goes through various moral stories and lessons in life, books and bed stories, he/she is confronted by life with a dilemma of expression. By constant exposure to a certain lifestyle, some may not even realise what is the difference compared to other forms of life. But someday as the kid grows, there comes a point to feel, think and contemplate. Based on previous encounters, personal learnings and exposures there comes a time to formulate a consistent belief system about self and how one would behave in life and circumstances. The kid can make a choice to either incorporate foul language in his everyday use or based on certain groups or try not to use it as much as it is not needed or completely oppose the use of it.

There are many situations in life that are similar to the above mentioned one. We as humans are faced with social, emotional, economical, ethical and moral situations in life. Our default opinion can lean towards what everyone is doing around us or we can contemplate and arrive at a conclusion based on our own thoughts and idealogies which may be similar to the existing situation or completely opposite of it. This can happen in following many traditions and rituals at home, neighborhood, events, occasions and festivals. This can happen at work while working with a group of people on some project. This can happen in neighborhood when deciding certain norms for the colony or when coming together for certain cause, occasion or event. This can happen during travel around the country and world. This can happen when you visit someone’s house. You can either be like them or be like yourself.

Don’t limit a child to your own learning, for he was born in another time.

Rabindranath Tagore

The nexus of superstitions. In every culture there are some stories, rituals, situations and encounters which are with no logical explanation. There might have been some in the past but in the present no one seems to be having any idea about why something is done in a particular fashion and what for exactly. There may be a reasoning about the benefits it brings but there certainly isn’t any relevance on how it will add up. But people face situations, they face difficulties, the go through tough circumstances in life and they see no way out only to be trying whatever options they have. Superstitions are part of our life in one way or the other. Sometimes very grim sometimes very subtle. There are self developed theories by individuals, families, localities, villages and communities. Those which do no harm to anyone are not of a concern as much as those who harm someone and most often a large group of people. The harm is subtle it is not involving any kind of direct pain, but it is a slow poison that becomes a part of their life without them realising the ill-effects of it. When presented with certain superstition, it often comes as a dilemma to either follow it, reason it or oppose it. In such situations you can often choose to be like them or not to be like them.

Everyday is an encounter in the beginning. Other situations like cultural influences, rituals, traditions, economical moves, fashion and lifestyle, choices about education, stay, investment, food choices and many other things are where you can make a choice. You may not be in absolute power to often influence others or bring about a change but you certainly can form your own opinion and focus on transforming your own life.


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Create value in your work

VALUE vs PRICE

Imagine you have a diamond necklace which costs around 10 lakh Rs. You bought it with all your hard earnings. Also you have a necklace that has been passed on from your great-grandmother. It was used by her, then her daughter, your mother and now it has been passed on to you. You have been keeping it with lot of care and affection. It is a silver necklace which costs around 1 lakh Rs.

Do something frequently that scares you.

When you run into a crisis situation led by whatever reason like corona, economic slowdown, bankruptcy of a company or other reasons local or global, you are to make a choice of giving up something to carry on with your life. You can either let go of the diamond necklace or your family inheritance. Often in such situations, we are ready to give up the diamond necklace, even if we have bought with all our savings. Even at one time it felt like a dream of life to own it, you are now ready to let go of it.

Why is that, because you value your grandmother’s necklace more than anything. It is because you can earn again and buy another diamond necklace, possibly even expensive one but you will not be able to reproduce the age old tradition of that particular necklace. It is the value that is hidden in the necklace.

So the diamond necklace is expensive and costly, while the great granny necklace is valuable and of innate importance to you.

In life we can create value for ourselves just like the grandmother’s necklace. We can choose to shine like a diamond but with any kind of attachment or value, in long run however expensive or famous it may be, things may get a twist. It is not that we may not perceive to gain more or shine more, but it is equally important to understand the inherent value associated with everything you do, especially your job. You must learn to create some value addition in your job and the things that you do.

If you are doing the same thing in the same way that you have been doing 5 years back then probably you haven’t gained any value. You may have become good at what you are doing, you may get paid well, you may get promoted but without the additional growth, value and importance put into yourself, with time things fade away. Especially when there is a crisis or a situation, certain aspect of life may take a turn. Sometimes the technology or the craftsmanship in which you are an expert might be no longer in use or has lost its popularity or importance in general walks of life. Even in that situation, you are force to relook at your abilities and skills.

So work hard or work smart, but work to create value for yourself and your surroundings.